Vassili shoved his hands deep into his trouser pockets, trying to blot out that inner voice.

The only thing you’re scared of is this feeling of losing control. These…emotions.

It had taken him years to feel as though he’d taken control of his life again but lately that restless feeling was back with a vengeance. Ever since leaving Laura.

To some he was the epitome of the privileged wastrel, permanently on holiday, pleasing himself without being tied to the burdens of responsibility. Others understood or at least suspected that he was the driving force behind Thanos Enterprises. But none of them, not even his family, realised how much self-control it had taken to build this life. To keep faith and do what he’d vowed.

The old heartache was still there, as strong as ever beneath the surface. That wasn’t surprising as it was carved into his bones. Sometimes it took all his energy to ignore it or at least pretend not to be affected.

Except during that week with Laura, when all his tension had bled away. Everything kept circling back to her.

Those days in Queensland had been remarkable for many things, not least the relief he’d felt as she distracted him from the darkness inside. No effort of control had been needed. She’d filled his days and nights and all his thoughts. He’d actually been able to relax totally for the first time in years.

Was that why he felt no relief now? Instead nausea twisted inside at the idea of her with her surfer dude.

Because he still craved that unique feeling that, for a brief time at least, everything was right in the world?

Impossible. He was living the life he needed. Who could ask for more?

A door closed and Vassili sensed her enter. He turned to see her leaning back against the kitchen counter, arms crossed, the sea-green stretch fabric of her top tight across her breasts. Did they look fuller than before? His palms itched. Once they’d filled his hands perfectly. Crazy how much he wanted to touch her again.

He met her frowning stare. It was glacial.

‘What are you doing here?’

He mirrored her gesture, crossing his arms and watching her attention flicker down to his chest before meeting his stare again. If she thought to intimidate him she had a lot to learn.

‘Surely that’s obvious. Are you pregnant?’